im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
