yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
