i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
