Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
