he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
your room smells of hookers.
And success
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
she told me i tasted like america
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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