I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I need moral support for this bender
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
