belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
