i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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