Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
