Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize
