well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
