I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
