No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
