My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
