No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
