what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
