addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
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