so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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