garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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