She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
