Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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