I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
