Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
