You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
