Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Can i not drive my cunt home
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
