He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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