im drinking this country out of the recession.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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