yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
