I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
