he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just had sex on a roof
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
