oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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