a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
