The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
either way he was missing a nipple.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize