which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
