One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
this hospital has no fireball
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
