can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Randomize
