Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
