I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
