garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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