He asked me if I "almost moaned"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
