what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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