i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
