Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
He passed out mid-signature
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
