it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize
