You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
