this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
