On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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