i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize