Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
