Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize