school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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