Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Holy shit dude........stairs
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize